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Managing Your Nervous System in the Midst of Chaos

Life has a way of throwing curveballs—unexpected stressors, emotional upheavals, or just the relentless pace of daily responsibilities. When chaos is present, whether in our personal lives or the world around us, our nervous system can become overwhelmed, which can leave us feeling anxious, frozen, or reactive.


As a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (SEP) and EMDR Consultant-in-Training, I often help clients navigate these turbulent states by working directly with the nervous system. The good news is that you have built-in tools to regulate yourself, even in the most chaotic moments.


1. Recognize Your State

The first step in nervous system regulation is noticing where your current state:

  • Fight/Flight: Do you feel on edge, restless, or irritable?

  • Freeze/Shut Down: Are you numb, foggy, or disconnected?

  • Fawn/People-Pleasing: Do you lose yourself in tending to others’ needs at the expense of your own?


Simply recognizing your experience can begin to change it.


2. Orient to Safety

When chaos is present, your nervous system may perceive threat, even when you are physically safe. Orienting helps remind your system that you are here, now, and okay.

  • Look around the room and name five neutral or pleasant objects.

  • Find something visually soothing (nature, a favorite color, soft lighting).

  • Listen for calming sounds—birds, music, white noise.


This simple practice helps shift your system from threat response to presence.


3. Engage the Breath (But Gently!)

Not all deep breathing is calming—some people find it agitating. Instead of forcing deep breaths, try:

  • Extended exhales (inhale for 4, exhale for 6).

  • Humming (stimulates the vagus nerve and soothes the system).

  • Sighing with sound (a natural reset).


The goal is to invite ease, not force control.


4. Use Containment & Grounding

If you feel overwhelmed, try:

  • Weighted blankets or a self-hug to create a sense of containment.

  • Pushing against a wall or pressing your feet into the ground to feel stability.

  • Holding an object (like a smooth stone or warm cup) to connect with the present moment.


Grounding brings your nervous system back into the here and now.


5. Pendulation: Move Between Activation & Resourcing

Rather than forcing yourself to calm down, allow yourself to gently pendulate between stress and ease.

  • Notice what feels chaotic or overwhelming.

  • Shift attention to something neutral or pleasant.

  • Go back and forth slowly, allowing your system to regulate itself.


This mirrors how the nervous system naturally processes stress and prevents emotional flooding.


6. Shake It Off (Literally!)

Animals naturally shake after stressful encounters to discharge excess energy. You can do the same!

  • Stand up and shake out your arms, legs, and torso for 30 seconds.

  • Bounce gently on your heels.

  • Wiggle your fingers and toes.


This helps release built-up tension in your system.


7. Connect With a Regulated Other

Co-regulation is powerful. If possible, seek connection with someone who feels steady—whether a loved one, therapist, or even a pet.

  • Make eye contact with someone safe.

  • Listen to a soothing voice.

  • Imagine a comforting presence if no one is available.


Our nervous systems are wired for connection, and regulation often happens in relationship.


8. Create Small Moments of Control

In chaos, we often feel powerless. Finding small ways to regain a sense of agency can be incredibly regulating.

  • Tidy a small space.

  • Choose what music to play.

  • Make a warm drink and savor it mindfully.


Even tiny choices help restore balance.


Final Thoughts

You don’t have to eliminate chaos to find steadiness within it. By working with your nervous system—rather than against it—you can cultivate resilience, presence, and a deeper sense of safety, no matter what’s happening around you.


What’s one regulation tool you’ll try today? Let me know in the comments!




 

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E-mail: acs@abundancecounselingservices.com

Call or Text: 281-940-5820

Here’s the revised text with grammar and spelling corrections: Licensed Psychotherapist | Mental Health | Clinical Social Worker | Atascocita | Humble | Houston | Kingwood | Colorado | DC | Florida | Maryland | Texas | Utah | Virginia

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